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Guess it could be considered foolhardy to look too far into the future when you’re old in age but young in heart. Whether it is or it isn’t, if you’re breathing and still have a working mind, use every millimeter of it. AND, go BIG in your thinking and planning. It’s just as easy to think BIG as it is to think small.

So, here’s what I’m thinking…

Get all your friends together, ALL of you, and insist, by cajoling, by insisting, by threatening loss of friendship, by any means available to you, except, of course, mind-altering drugs, weaponry of any kind, or, poisons of any kind.

Now that you’ve got all of your friends together, ALL of you, brain-whip them into buying BR Chitwood’s books, either paperback or e-book.

‘WHY’? You Ask!

Because it’s simply the right thing to do! They will see how a most worthy author writes excellent books, nay, quintessential books, literary quality (though lacking leather covers!), and for the price that one might pay for apple pie al a mode or a small pack of lung-oxidizing cigarettes…that is, if anyone smokes these days – it’s been thirty-five years since I gave them up. And, I had just bought a pack…crushed them with one hand. But, back to ‘breathing and working minds’ and ‘buying my books’!

‘BUT, WHY’? You ask again. So, being the right thing to do is not enough! Then, gracious! Think of book stores, of those unseen electronic elves that magically form the words onto a screen attached to a ‘mis-nomered’ tablet and/or laptop…did you know that a “‘killer whale’ is a ‘misnomer’ for what is one of the gentlest marine creatures known to man?” Actually, that is a very good description of my books (NOT, the ‘marine creature’ thingy!) AND a good reason for you, ALL your friends and all your neighbors to BUY my books. Hope I didn’t make you think of going to Sea-World…that’s much more expensive than buying my books.

Now, go back and read the first line of this missive! I believe you folks to be good and honest people, so I ask you, did I not convince you to buy my books?

It’s not easy to make a fool of oneself, but for the sake of my books I’ll do that in the very next blog post I write but, for now, think of these good reasons I’ve given you here to buy my books.

‘Dimwittingly’ yours!

BR Chitwood – September 11, 2018

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22 comments on “BUY MY BOOKS

  1. D.L Finn, Author says:

    You dont need to convince me Billy. Your post cracked me up. I would love to make everyone but books…but they certainly make great gifts;)

    Liked by 2 people

    1. All I say is we need many, many more Denise Finns in the world! ♥♥♥

      Liked by 2 people

  2. C.E.Robinson says:

    Billy Ray, the bird is glaring at us! But, he’s a cute little birdie, so not too threatening. You should get some sales with your humorous /serious pitch! I for one will check out your books! Happy Wednesday! 📚 Christine

    Liked by 1 person

    1. How sweet of you! AND, sorry, I didn’t scroll down far enough, so I late with this response. My best wishes to you. ♥♥

      Liked by 2 people

  3. Billy Ray, you are one of a wonderful kind. That was quite a teaser with this post. 😀 Hugs.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. If I’m lucky enough to be in that group, I’m joining you, sweet lady! ♥♥♥

      Liked by 2 people

  4. Unique pitch, my friend. it is worth a try but I have to tell you, my friends don’t buy my books so I’m not sure how successful I’ll be.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Missed this one, too! I don’t scroll down far enough! Better late than never! (Who said that stale statement???) ♥♥

      Liked by 2 people

      1. Lately, Billy Ray Chitwood says that stale statement..

        Liked by 1 person

      2. That’s cruel, John! And, it hurts! 🙂 ♥

        Liked by 2 people

      3. Great weekend to you, good John! ♥

        Liked by 1 person

      4. Thank you, Billy Ray. You as well.

        Liked by 1 person

  5. cagedunn says:

    This link shows you how to put a ‘review’ link to the cover of each book; it saves the reader a few clicks, and is useful for that alone.
    I didn’t use the html, just the link (as if it were attaching an ordinary pic to a link).

    Good luck!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Ah, thank you so much! How kind of you! Best wishes! ♥

      Liked by 1 person

      1. cagedunn says:

        The word was supposed to be ‘preview’ link – sorry.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. I do it all the time! 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

  6. A humorous and playful pitch, Billy Ray. Perhaps you’re onto something here. If it works, you’re a genius, and I’ll follow in your footsteps. 😀

    Liked by 1 person

    1. No genius lives here, Diana, just an old hack hacking away on his laptop! Thanks for the consoling… ♥

      Liked by 2 people

  7. Using Free Willy as a marketing tool- nice! lol
    Seriously though, great pitch idea, Billy Ray. I hope it nets you a gazillion sales 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. B R Chitwood says:

      Thanks, Jacquie. Wishing you the best.

      Liked by 1 person

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